Holiday Bruise

I went on a holiday and I got bruised. Obviously.

 

 

As I do every summer, I went up north to the island where my nan grew up. For the last few years, the big highlight has been the annual FISHING FESTIVAL, and this time was no different. It wasn’t at the festival I got bruised though (true story, see the “sober” tag!?), it was on my journey home. I couldn’t even sit down in my seat on the flight like a normal person without getting bruised.

Also, when taking these pics I accidentally banged my knee against the table and I suspect there will be decent bruisage tomorrow.

Also also, I now have a phone with a much better camera, and the wordpress app as well, so I predict a shiny great near future for this blog. Aw yeah.


Swollen Foot Bruise

Today, ladies and gentlemen, we have a returning guest star on the blog. The last time Annicken was bruised enough to end up here, a lot of people apparently had trouble making out which part of her body, or at least of her leg, was in the picture. It’s her upper thigh you mentalistis, it’s not her fucking knee.

ANYWAY. This time you should have no problem locating the bruisage on her, but you might have more difficulty trying to figure out what’s happened to her. I certainly have no idea. Annicken, if you’re reading this, care to share the story with us…?


Spectacular fall

I fell on the street yesterday. And I wasn’t even particularly drunk, it was on my way out rather than on my way back home as is more common obvs. This could have gone a whole lot worse, as I actually had a glass in my bag which was smashed, but no broken glass anywhere in my skin thankfully.

Some of these obviously look less dramatic now that the blood’s washed off and all, and there’s the ever recurring crappy laptop camera issue, but even so I’m sure you can imagine the combined effect of all these scratches and bruises.

1. Left shoulder

2. Right hand, palm

3. Right knee

4. Left hand, knuckle

5. Side of left knee

6. Left elbow

7. Left hand and wrist

I’m also pretty sure that everyone saw my underpants when this happened.


Damaged Ligament Bruise

I’ve been off crutches for a week after I dislocated my knee, and the bruises that I already had when that happened are beginning to fade.

However, a few days ago as I was visiting my sister, she noticed that the back of my knee was massively bruised. I hadn’t even realised (it’s a difficult place to see anything much even when you’re trying, as I’ve discovered) because it didn’t hurt, but it was one of the most painful places while my knee was still dislocated. And the doctors said that I’d damaged and somehow “stretched” (but not torn, thank god) the ligament so my theory is that the bruising is from that. Because while I’m no ligament expert, you can see how the bruise is pretty much in a straight line, and if you feel the back of your knee you’ll see how there’s something just under the skin which I’m guessing is the ligament that I damaged. This theory is supported by google image search so it must be valid.

From what I can tell, it looks like it’s fading now, more yellowish anyhow. Fascinating stuff eh!


Bruised and dislocated

The bruises are mostly still from crawling through a secret tunnel the other night. However, last night whilst dancing in a highly intoxicated state at Get Dancy!, I fell over and landed on my knee somehow, and noticed that the kneecap was pointing in a highly unnatural angle. I got it back in place somehow and carried on dancing probably, and making out with someone certainly, but it’s pretty sore still so I didn’t sleep well and can’t walk properly and have phoned my mum to come pick me up and take care of me and tell me that everything is going to be ok.

 

 


Urban Exploration Bruises

Went crawling through a secret tunnel early one morning with my buddy Jørgen. I was afraid it would be full of spiders which it was not, just scraped my knees instead which I can live with.

It actually looks more painful in real life than it does in these pics. Hopefully it will look even worse in the next couple of days so that it can be captured decently on my phone camera.


Bonus Phone Bruises

Uhh. Found these on my phone. As per usual, no memory of any of it (not even of taking the pictures, actually).