Ass Bruise

Uhh yeah, fell down some stairs. This bruise is from the first impact so it’s the result of my entire body weight on one brick stair edge. I don’t normally go around posting pictures of my arse on the internet but come on, this bruise is just too good.

 

 

Some other bruises as well, though nothing to compete with that, obviously. It’s a wonder I didn’t break any bones to be honest, my ribs and shoulder are pretty sore as well.

 

 

 

 


Spectacular fall

I fell on the street yesterday. And I wasn’t even particularly drunk, it was on my way out rather than on my way back home as is more common obvs. This could have gone a whole lot worse, as I actually had a glass in my bag which was smashed, but no broken glass anywhere in my skin thankfully.

Some of these obviously look less dramatic now that the blood’s washed off and all, and there’s the ever recurring crappy laptop camera issue, but even so I’m sure you can imagine the combined effect of all these scratches and bruises.

1. Left shoulder

2. Right hand, palm

3. Right knee

4. Left hand, knuckle

5. Side of left knee

6. Left elbow

7. Left hand and wrist

I’m also pretty sure that everyone saw my underpants when this happened.


I have a face on my elbow

Ok so obviously this is more of a scratch than a bruise BUT IT LOOKS LIKE A FACE. ON MY ELBOW.

 

 

I got this last night when trying to interfere in an actual fight outside Revolver. I don’t think I helped much though.


Needle Bruise

My friend Vilde has spent most of this autumn in the hospital with some rare disease or condition that no one seems to be able to figure out. Personally, I think it’s lupus, but the doctor’s haven’t asked for my advice yet.

 

Anyway, because Vilde is such a frail and delicate flower, this was the result of the incessant poking of her veins with needles. Impressive.

 

Glad to hear you’re out of there now V-dawg, and hope you’re feeling all better soon! If not though, keep sending me pix of your bruises.


Might not even be a bruise at all

…but if it’s not a bruise, then what the hell is that V-shaped thing on my elbow?

(My brother tried to help me achieve greater success with shitting Photo Booth, but to no avail.)


Fell and the ice and probably somwhere else too

These bruises are not very spectacular (it’s a combination of this and the fact that I’ve also misplaced my non-laptop camera that’s the reason why I’m pointing them out to you in these pics, where possible), but there are quite a few of them and they are the first ones I’m posting that I actually currently have! I got these during the weekend, probably at Grünerløkka Brygghus, Mono, O’Reilly’s, Aku Aku or Revolver. Or somewhere else entirely, who knows?

I also got a bit of a whiplash from falling backwards on the ice (I was too busy telling my friend to be careful, to actually take any care myself) and I have a feeling there might be a bruise on its way, but it’s too soon to tell. I’ll obviously keep you posted.

I’d also like to add a disclaimer: in all the pictures that I post, I am actually as fully clothed as possible (hi joe). Just thought I’d put that out there.